I think I've sorta figured out my obsession with my son. Why I baby him, let him drink from a sippy cup still at 7, why everything he does is genius, why my heart gets fantastically broken everyday by him and why he just literally lights up my world.
He's going to be a man someday.
He will have to support a family. He will be a Father. He will have the responsibilities and stresses of this big bad world.
And before he does any of that he will be expected at 19 to open an envelope sent from Utah telling him where the church has called him to serve a mission for 2 years. He doesn't get a say. It could be the suburbs of Ohio or the ghettos of Russia.
Still a teenager he will be expected to serve the Lord and preach our gospel to all those ready to hear. He may have to learn another language in 3 months like his Father did. There will be no T.V, music or computers. For 2 years. Most likely he will eat food he does not like. I am sure he will get homesick.
That's the hard part for me. I want to make his life wonderful. I want home to be joyous and safe, with an uplifting and creative environment. I want him to always want to be here and look forward to walking through our front door knowing there will be a hot meal and a mother's love.
But I also know it's my job to teach him how to work hard and get by without me. Flourish even outside this home.
I will continue to let him crawl in bed with me after a scary dream and make his oatmeal with strong seeds (chia) just the way he likes it with a pat of butter and a drizzle of honey on top. Reluctantly I will let Glenn steer me to let go. To not rush to him when he gets hurt. To not baby him. To let him deal with the bullies and live with the consequences of his actions. To encourage him to stand up for himself and find the words in sticky situations.
I feel time tick tocking away. Baby him, I hear myself say, his time as a boy is short, his time as a man will last a lifetime.
It won't happen overnight. But it must be done
And if he turns out anything like his dad.......my job is done.
Very touching Marie. He will be like Glenn I can already tell. Ya know after visiting for four days, I can tell these things...I think about my boys going on their missions more and more. It's going to be hard, it's going to in so many ways shape them strongly.
ReplyDeleteYou're doing the right thing and your sweet husband will help you to balance your "motherly love." Happy Mothers Day to a beautiful, devoted woman.
Love,
Shauna
My prayer for your son is that wherever his mission takes him (though that day is not yet here!), he ends up somewhere where he knows he is loved and is able to share the blessings and knowledge he has been given with others.
ReplyDeleteHappy Mother's Day!
Oh you are just the sweetest mamma.
ReplyDeleteAs a mom, that would be so very difficult to let him go for 2 years like that with so many unknowns. But like you said, if he turns out like your hubs, it's a journey well worth taking.
ReplyDeleteBut enjoy that little man while he's little!
Beautiuful!
ReplyDeleteI hope you had a wonderful Mother's Day...
...and wish you a great week!
One Little Boy's Mom :)
Great photo of your two handsome men, Marie! Happy Belated Mother's Day! Hug and squeeze Ethan while you can. Little boys are the best!
ReplyDeleteWhat a sweet sweet picture of your husband and son. :)
ReplyDeleteAWWWW! How sweet! He is definitely a cutie. ;) I hope you had a great Mother's Day....
ReplyDeletexo
purposelyathome.blogspot.com
I was a single mom for 8 years so I raised Hannah to be independent from a very early age. Once she was potty trained, if she had to go to the bathroom when we were out, it was her responsibility to ask someone where it was - yep at 2 1/2!
ReplyDeleteBut I agree, they grow up so fast - my daughter is moving out in just 3 weeks!
Ah, so sweet! I love your mom-ming posts (that's "mom" being used as a verb, haha). I can just see the love you have for your family and your interest in all your kids growing up to be good people! (I also totally wish I still had a sippy cup...)
ReplyDeleteIf I knew one of my babies would go away to an unknown place at 19 I would baby them too.
ReplyDeleteWhat a handsome boy he is indeed. I think the 2 years of service is such a wonderful life lesson, but I can see where it would be very difficult for you. God will put him in the right place, albeit 12 years from now.
ReplyDeleteLove that father-son photo!
ReplyDeleteI've heard mothers adore their sons!
ReplyDeleteSweet shot of your hubby & your son. I think he will be very much like your Husband but I understand the fear and hopefulness.
ReplyDeleteSo sweet, Marie! Boys and their mommas have such a special bond, but because of your faith, yours is so much deeper. I admire your family's courage and support over Ethan's future- Im sure he is thankful for such amazing role models to prepare him for his journey! I love this post.
ReplyDeleteI love the photo of your two VERY handsome boys!!
ReplyDeleteToo sweet..... your two handsome "boys". Just from reading your blog each week, I know there is no shortness of love, affection, understanding and faith in your household...... I think you and he will be just fine.
ReplyDeletewhat a beautiful post to your son! i'm confident that he will be just the best man as he gets older and properly serves those around him!
ReplyDeletexo TJ
Happy Tuesday!
ReplyDeleteWhat I meant to say yesterday, in my allergy induced haze, was that I heard mothers were more attached to their sons than their daughters... I know my MIL is!
Oh, you pulled at my heartstrings with this one! It is so true. Sometimes we try so hard to take care of them that we don't let them take care of themselves. Even though it is all out of love we need to remember to let them grow and learn for themselves. Beautiful post!
ReplyDeleteThis is such a sweet post!
ReplyDeleteSweetest...post...ever, Marie! I've been kind of MIA from blogging but am hoping that I'm back. ( I still haven't forgotten about your tag!)
ReplyDeleteI have always wondered what it is about moms and their boys. You are a genius! I think you are right on with your conclusion. We are teaching these little guys to be men someday. Men that will take care of their responsibilities and love their families. We have a big job to do, don't we?
Such a sweet and loving mother. It is this kind of love that really make kids want to stay at home. Your baby will grow up one day and become what you have said. But your teachings and the things you'be said and taught him will always stay in him.
ReplyDelete